Our six contestants have arrived after their road trip, and the first thing they need to do is build a ring in what seems a very poorly-lit arena. Kay Lee talks about “paying your dues”, Mark talks about not being “lazy”, the usual indy wrestler spiel about pulling one’s weight.
Noam looks shattered, but helpfully tells us about the kicking Grado has been getting from the others. (Presumably in an effort to give him a “scrappy underdog”-type arc.)
Dave says he is “involved” in giving Grado a hard time; Rampage talks about their “pranks”, which include cable-tying his legs together and throwing him on the pissy bathroom floor. Rampage doesn’t care that Grado was upset about his new t-shirt being ruined because he’s just “a slug in a singlet”; Mastiff LITERALLY SAYS it was “banter”.
Dave Mastiff. You can go off a person, you know.
Grado is nervous and flatulent; and then they all get to meet Ethan Carter III. Kay Lee looks as though she’s about to giggle when he greets her with, “‘Sup ‘sup ‘sup ‘sup ‘sup,” and beams at her as he works his way down the line, stroking Rampage’s beard en route and talking to Mastiff about the “big guy stuff” he can do.
One double-take later…
“I look forward to working with you. And by working with you I mean slapping you in the face, you Scottish piece of haggis. BOOM! BURNT!”
Mastiff is then the one who looks like he’s about to giggle.
Into the six-sided ring, then, with Austin Aries, Zema Ion and Magnus on hand with Al Snow. They all pass on advice about the peculiar set-up of the ring, our intrepid six all get a chance to have a run-out, Mark complaining that six-sided rings are “completely different” to four-sided ones, and Noam looking like he’d given himself whiplash.
Kay Lee, incidentally, has a wrestle with Zema (even though “YOU WON’T BE WRESTLING MEN IN TNA!”) to the backing track of Snow sneering, “Only girl on the whole squad!”
Aries tries to wear Mastiff out and trip him up. A-Double might be sneaky, but Mastiff is the Bastard, and won’t be caught out.
EC3 heckles Grado from the floor as he takes on Noam, and then clambers into the ring to call Noam “Steve” and then say he’d rather watch his parents make out than watch him wrestle. Grado isn’t happy, calling the “big boy” out, but EC3 has a hot yoga appointment to get to.
Next week – some matches! Grado being a muppet! Al Snow scolding him! Join me then!