I love my WWE heels, as you know, and a ladder match for a World Heavyweight Championship contract contested by Wade Barrett, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Dean Ambrose, Fandango, Jack Swagger and Antonio Cesaro makes me a very happy woman.
Except – who am I supposed to want to win? Or perhaps more importantly, who’s supposed to be the good guy?
Barring anything interesting happening on Smackdown (I mean, seriously, this seems unlikely), something is going to have to happen during the match itself, surely.
Everyone’s attention is focused on the Daniel Bryan v CM Punk title match, with AJ as special guest referee, but something weird is going to happen in the Money in the Bank match for former WWE champions.
Yes, OK, there seems to be a consensus that John Cena will win so everything else is academic, but there’s more to this match than there initially appears.
For starters, there is no way it’ll just have four contestants, with two of them being Kane and Big Show. It would be the most tedious ladder match of all time.
It’s a question I often ponder. Will anything ever be as exciting as the denouement of the 2011 Money in the Bank PPV?
In fact, the whole show was worked brilliantly – the Smackdown MitB briefcase match was a fantastic opening to the show, and Christian proved his cowardly heel credentials against Randy Orton.
And somehow it doesn’t matter that somewhere between that and Randy Orton v Christian there was Kelly Kelly versus a Bella, the Henry v Show hossfest and a Raw briefcase match whose conclusion was obvious from the start.
What was great about the PPV was REALLY great, and your enduring images of it will be Daniel Bryan sobbing as he clutched the blue briefcase that guarantees him a title shot at some point in the future, and CM Punk high-tailing it out of the building, WWE belt in tow.
It’s the great man’s birthday today, and so in his honour I’ve watched Money in the Bank on a loop.
But obviously you’ve already seen that, so here’s something you might not have seen – darts player Paul Nicholson, who likes to think of himself as the Punk of his sport, decided to emulate his walk-on. It confused the hell out of probably 97 per cent of the people watching, but for those of us who understood, it was amazing.
Money in the Bank is possibly the greatest thing I have ever seen on television.
I’m not ashamed to admit I was sobbing into my blanket as Punk took the title and left the building – I tweeted at the time, “Crying and marking out and shouting at the television. I’m 31 and I know this is storylined.”
That’s the power of a good PPV, good writing and, of course, the power of Punk. The match itself, though terrific, was secondary. It was the storyline that was being conveyed that was important.
Anyone else slightly troubled by Smackdown’s bizarre time-travelling escapades last week? As Big Show returned, he told us that he’d been out of action for four months; Mark Henry reiterated that Show had joined the Hall of Pain four months ago.
At this point I began counting up on my fingers to verify the truth of these statements. But then WWE did the work for me by reminding me that it all happened at Money in the Bank, which was on Sunday July 17.
Dudes, that’s not even three months ago. What possible purpose can it serve to lie about that – and in such a half-assed way? Do let me know your thoughts in the comments.